Primary school

Seven sister primary school.

This school was only a short walk from where we lived in turner avenue. It was a non-uniform school but my mother made us a uniform for me and my sister. We wore paleitted skirts knee high socks and mathing waist coats. We always had Ribben in our hair. I don’t remember to much about this school.

Highbury quadrant primary school

This school was only short walk from my mother partner flat where we were staying. All I remember is how lonely the playground felt when you don’t have any friends. I learnt how to copy work from the person sitting next to me.

Church field primary school

I started travelling to school alone and I remember the journey to and fro. I liked this school and I got to play many sports. I had a few friends but I was torn between to different groups of girls. One group of girls where very popular and the other very friendly. I spent most of my time in-between the two groups that it became stressful. All I know about this period us that my life was surrounded by a black cloud at school. My sister stealing had spiralled out of control. The school called the police and everyone was talking about it. I had a lot of things on my mind. I was worried about my sister and what would happen next. My home life was particular difficult. School confirm my belief that I was a misfit.

Because of my sisters problem school was tence. I didn’t like the feeling that someone was always watching my and that they was a spot light on my family. Loytata was my best friend she was a big girl and like me didn’t fit in with others. I enjoyed her company.

South harringay primary school

I remember sleeping on a mattress on the floor and the mice running around. It was a long wait before I got into this school.

I started having piano lesson which I loved. I was pretty quite in class but would fight in the playground.

We played conca battles and I was obsessed with a band called E17 and I use to collect their stickers in a book. They was a girl called Angela who always had a own special teacher next to her and I use to call her spastic and stupid . Horribly hurtful words and I didn’t even know why. School wasn’t important it was a prison aways prison. I never felt welcome or cared for just another number along a long line. I had no desire to do well at anything because I had already been told I was stupid by my mother. I wasn’t interested in the outside world because my dreamworlds was much my inspiring.

The thing I remembered most about school is the lunch. The freedom to choose what you want. Not like at home where you have to eat whatever you are given. Even if it made you physical sick. I liked the freedom I had a lunch time and I enjoyed the desserts chocolate cake and chocolate custard were my favourite.

I became pretty good at iron my uniform.

I learnt to swim at this school as it had it own swimming pool.

It was in the last year of school that I tried to commit sueside and failed. I know from experience that normal this would have been viewed as a cry for help but at that time I truly did want life to end.

Year 5 & 6

My summer project of 94′ gave me something to do in the long 6 week holiday. I hated the summers because it meant no need to worry about unexplained cut marks and bruises. My mother was free to treat us however she wanted. 6 week felt like a life time and a never ending nightmare. Bored stiff and walking on egg shells trying to be good.

I was happy to have homework, I gave me a good reason to leave the house. I spent my summer in the Libaray researching black History and individual who had made a contribution. I loved reading their stories of courage and determination. I was inspired by individual I had researched. I wrote a page on each person and draw a picture of them. I complied a A4 folder with a content page of names from A to Z. I was particular interested in Martin Luther king and malcom x and how they both used different method to fight their battles. As I read the words the stored resinated deep with my heart. I wondered what I would have been like in the slaves days a weather I would have had to courage need to stand up for what I believe in. I had hoped I would. I met many grate individuals through the text I sought and their memories lived on in my dreams.