A couple of days ago I watched a video of a group of yr7 girls intimating and attacking two girls from another school.
”article and video on daily mail bully-grabs-school girl-hair-punches-kicks”
One girl had her hair pulled until she was dropped to her knees. Then her attacker started kicking and punching whilst dragging her.
Young beautiful little black girls. One acting like a top dog ready to rip anyone apart for no apparent reason. Her victim had no idea of the type of rage and violence that was standing in front of her.
As I watched the clip my heart sunk. I instantly felt unsettled, angry, saddened and ashamed. The video upset every part of my being and I wouldn’t be able to sleep until I did something about it.
Well, turns out I wasn’t the only person who felt that way. Someone very loosely connected to me had already posted it on Facebook and both parents had responded. The school, the parents and the police had already been notified. The daily mail had written its article and the school is asking us not to share the video.
The victim has been receiving lots of support and encouraging messages. While the aggressor has been receiving death threats at the age of 12.
My heart went out to the victim and her parents.
But I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the aggressor. I knew only too well that those violent acts do not come from no where. No one wakes up one day and suddenly starts being a violent volatile 12 year old.
I’m assuming she has been through or witnessed her own set of violence from a young age. Her surroundings and her upbringing may have told her that violence is a way.
She may see the world as a threatening place for that reason attacks it before it attacks her. The only problem with that is that most cases there may not be threat as the video shows. She may be willing to attack because that is her comfort zone, being around violence makes it a familiar ground for her.
She is also a victim in my opinion. She is 12yrs old, she is a child and her innocence has not been allowed to flourish.
When you surround children with violence – they become violent in many cases. Whether they are expose to a father who beats their mother or a parent who unleashes their angry and frustration on them with violence.
This situation usually has life changing effects on a person’s life.
When you look at the world from the eyes of a scared child, it is easy to see how that child takes those same scared eyes to school and around with her on the streets. The only problem with that is that when you are scared your natural responses is “fight or flight” are you going to run, and freeze or are you going to fight and protect yourself.
It doesn’t matter that there was no real threat and that person you think is attacking has no intention of hurting you. In your mind you have been here before and you are going to protect yourself the only way you know how … with your fist and your spider tongue after all, you are a tough girl right.
Your home environment plays an important role in determining who you are and how you react.
We teach our children how to deal with situations by how they see us deal with them. We are their reference point.
Most behaviour has been seen and learned from somewhere. All children are sponges, they are hungry and thirsty for a referfence point in how to deal with life.
Hurt people can easily hurt other people and happy people can sometimes make others happy.
These hurting children are all around us, they are in our schools, workplaces, prisons and they one day going become parents, then the cycle continues.
Please understand, these children are still children. They are like a piece of fruit battered and bruised on the outside but the core is still sweet. That Apple is still going to be sweet at its core even though it has been rolled around in the mud a few times.
Unless someone is willing to slowly peel back the previous damage with love, care, attention and time those apples can grow up with a range of problems. Drugs, alcohol abuse, violent, rage and a hot temper are only a few.
How do I know so much about it, it’s because?…
I’ve spent my entire adult life battling myself to find my sweet core.